Why won't he take a bath?
by lordess-of-the-ring
Summary: Gimli and Legolas can't take it anymore.......Aragon simply refuses to take a bath. They have tried everything until they think of the one person who can tame Aragorn....Arwen. Who else is more stubborn and persistent at nagging?


The truth comes out  
  
Aragorn sat on a log, staring thoughtfully through the fire. Thoughts of Arwen were swirling through his mind. He almost felt her smooth hand on his shoulder. Suddenly he looked up and caught Legolas gazing at him. "What?" Aragorn demanded "Oh.nothing" Legolas replied, a devilish smile broadening upon his face. "What! Tell me!" Aragorn demanded again, even louder. "Well, the elf and I have been thinking." Gimli interrupted Legolas gulped. "Don't you think it's time you have a bath?" Gimli continued. "You're really starting to smell. off," Legolas admitted "Gimli and I can't put up with it anymore!" Aragorn stood up and pranced around the fire. "Well, SORRY if I'm not a perfect elf that doesn't need a bath to smell moderately good!" Legolas gritted his teeth. Gimli instantly sensed trouble and stood between them. "We mean no offense, just take it into consideration. Please?" reassured Gimli. "Take into consid.How could y. But.We are at WAR!" shouted Aragorn "War! Don't you understand? I don't need a bath, I must fight! Now leave me at peace!" Gimli and Legolas backed away cautiously. They exchanged nervous looks. "Please, just think on it. Pretty please?" asked Legolas's quivering voice. "Fine, but don't expect answers soon." Grumbled Aragorn. Aragorn turned his back against the two shaking figures.  
  
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A Plan Is Made  
  
"What in Middle-Earth are we going to do with him?" sighed Legolas as he threw up his arms and slumped against a tree. "He'll come around one day. What if.." Legolas straightened up his back and leaned forward. "What if (when Aragorn is sleeping) we just throw water on top him and quickly scrub away before he even knows what's happening!" whispered Gimli. Gimli performed a little demonstration. They both gave a hearty laugh. "Yes, but what after that?" muttered the elf, "He might smell fresh, but he will hate us for eternity!" "I suppose you are right. As always.Perfect Legolas!" mumbled Gimli "What did you say?" Legolas snapped "Nothing.." said the dwarf, "I've got it!" "Huh?" "I've got it! Arwen!!" said Gimli thoughtfully. "Arwen? What?" puzzled Legolas. "Arwen can make him!!" proclaimed Gimli. "Who else is so stubborn and persistent at nagging? And she's the only one who can tame Aragorn." "Gimli. You are a genius" laughed the prince of Mirkwood. Gimli lifted his head with pride. Suddenly there was rustling in the bushes. "It must be Aragorn, we'll speak more later." Whispered Gimli.  
  
Aragorn's Perspective  
  
Aragorn gazed thoughtfully at the fire again. The flames reminded him of hands desperately reaching out to him. 'Take a bath, Aragorn' they suggested. 'What are they thinking? Take a bath? I don't smell that bad, do I?' He swiped his arm under his nose and took a deep sniff. His head was swirling, filled with various aromas. Dirt, sweat, blood and pickles. 'Not too shabby' he thought. 'They can't make me! I simply won't! NEVER!' He fell back and settled down. 'Maybe I was a bit too angry with Legolas for no reason. Anyway, he was just suggesting I take a bath, not demanding it. Actually, he was only saying it for my own personal hygiene. Oh I don't know! I have no time to think about this folly, I must put my energy towards helping Gondor and Rohan.' Aragorn continued to ramble long into the night. By then, the fire had died out long ago and Aragorn realized it was really late. 'I must get back to Gimli and Legolas, I need rest for tomorrow.' He stood up and walked back to the camp, where he met Gimli and Legolas sitting together.  
  
Coming Soon!  
  
-Will Aragorn take a bath?  
-How will Gimli and Legolas contact Arwen?  
-Why is Aragorn so defensive about taking a bath?  
-Since when was Gimli big on hygiene?  
  
**********Please Review!***********  
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